had a very meaningful night tonight. went for ruoling's church's youth fellowship dinner and service (is that what it's called?) tonight and im glad to say that i enjoyed every minute of it. maybe everything was new to me and it was pretty refreshing and all. the ideas the pastor introduced and i have to admit i didnt quite exactly agreed with everything he said, but to be able to find links between the bible and science is pretty amazing. i was just asking ruoling if i can borrow the bible from the library to read for pleasure and she was like "i dont think so.." the bible seems a pretty interesting read, but i wonder if it is not right to treat it as a text for pleasure reading. maybe not exactly pleasure reading but something i can read and think about it. is that considered pleasure reading? doesnt seem so but i cant seem to place it anywhere else. arhgh im babbling.

i must say i consider myself a freethinker and all, but my mum wouldnt like me to convert to christianity but i dont mind going to listen with an open mind. and including the fact that my mum dont get to know about where im going. yeah. but at the same time i dont think im one who is very religious. personally i see things and events as basis on logic and reasoning, with evidence and cause and effect, so i would see things being related and all. but at the same point in time i believe that everything is already originally in placed, just awaiting discovery by mankind. so where would that place me? sounds a little confusing and i think im getting confused as well. yeah. but i guess it is good for me to start out somewhere and see if that particular religion is suited for me. like i told ruoling, if i knew the malay language, i would have started reading the quran. oops. but i cant help it la. inqusitive mind and the love for languages. alamak. now i seriously wonder if such actions are appropriate. somebody enlighten me.