xian.

today i finally realise. those who blogs and updates their blogs are those with too much spare time on their hands and have nothing better to do. like me, who consistently updates everyday, come online and find that nobody is bloody hell online cos they are all busy with school or whatever rag/orientation and dont give a damn about blogging anymore. which is true. and this stupid fact took a bloody long time to hit me. i feel like an idiot. fine im not feeling too happy now. in fact, xian like nobody's business. im not saying that i dint go out today, but somehow the whole thing just took a down turn and yea, i wasnt too happy at the end of it all. fucking bitch. what the hell. i dont give a bloody damn. so xian so xian. got comn serve tmr, but somehow i dont look forward to it now. got camp on friday and saturday, but i dont look forward to it now. feel like ponning them all. ahhhhh. foul mood aint i? dont care dont give a damn. i feel like locking myself up at home and keep away from the outside world. make myself feel even more horrible and isolated. since nobody is free anyway. what the bloody hell. fine go do your own business and dont give a damn about me. go ahead. im just so plain xian. so plain tired. sleepy. maybe i should go sleep. ah sigh.
im not supposed to throw tantrums. in fact i dont have the right to. according to my mum. but i dont care. i dont give a damn. like what i said, it's one part of me that will never change. i dont care if im bloody over sensitive or whatsoever. i just dont feel -fine-. happy? need i tell you every single thing about how i feel when you dont even bother to tell me your stuff and cannot even keep simple promises?
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
i hate people who cannot keep promises. under extreme circumstances, forgivable. but never make them if you know you cannot fulfil them. never or i'll bite. like now.
got a new phone. but surprisingly dont feel so high or happy about it. that one has a message counter. good. i'll know how much i msg a month. i feel like an intense mobile phone user now considering i have free incoming now. oh wells. xian. bored.