my sis just showed my her friend's blog where some stranger all the way from the other side of the globe (i.e. US) scolded her right in her comments page about her not using proper english plus whatever other shit. of course my sis was fuming about it as she sees no right in that guy scolding her friend about her usage of language. which is partially true. so my sis had to go give that guy a blasting on his own blog comments page. heh. and then being the kaypo me, i felt like putting my GP skills to use so i went to email that guy and ramble on and on about Singaporean students having most blogs with improper English and the significance of Singlish in our daily lives, and of course, shooting him indirectly by commenting that since we are all not native speakers of the universal language, it is therefore natural that we dont converse and write in proper English sentences. Of course, the email i sent was in nice proper English so that he wouldnt think it was bullshit.

but as i think about it more, i realise that it seems as though when we were at the age between 13-16, we seem to like to use shortforms and abbreviations in our emails, and chatting. as i grow older, i would prefer to use more proper english, though it aint extremely proper. but you wont catch me using words like "dun", "issit", "onli" etc. one big problem of me blogging here is that my punctuation is usually gone. except for the commas and foolstops obviously. but i still make coherent sentences right? *grin* maybe at the particular point in life, everbody seemed to be using those form of language for communication and you feel a need to fit in and use the same lingo as everybody else. or else you might just be thrown aside and considered an outcast. which can be very hard to get rid of. i know. or maybe it wouldnt be that extreme. but i know that people from my sister's school usually converses in mandarin, so it's not surprising to see them have their thoughts made out in chinese first, then put on paper or the web in english. which may sound weird once it is out in black and white. i used to do that too, but now rarely. i usually think in english and put them now nicely. or maybe for the fact that i rarely write in chinese nowadays. which is quite a sad thing. to think i used to "tou gao" to friday weekly and get all excited at seeing my pieces coming out on paper. not to mention, keeping a steady flow of income into my bank account but that is besides the point.

i know i need to write to get my emotions and feelings out. that's why i blog or write in a diary. maybe that's why i perform better for my languages. maybe that's why i make a great letter writer. hee. im blabbing on again. as usual.

my bad habit. *grin*

today is such a lazy saturday afternoon... boring. so contradictory. when i work on saturday mornings, i feel tired. but when it is my saturday off, i find nothing to do and i have been watching tv ever since this morning 11pm. all the way until 2.15 when i really found nothing better to watch on tv. wanted to watch the repeat of shi zi lu kou that features singapore, sun yanzi and tanya chua but as usual i decided to come online and blog again. maybe i should try and exercise my brain a little. *yawn* hm. but how? i realise im crapping to myself again. as usual. when i have nothing better to do online..

i like this new layout. simple in a way yet it's nice and neat.. just exactly what i like.
the whiteness of it all, and the emphasis that's on the words, and the picture at the same time suits me all. nice. cool. both literally and pictorially and physically. *grin*

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
im on such a high. i dint know the OCS commissioning parade can make me go soo high. whee. haha.. like i got to meet yuan and sijia again.. crap and gossip with them.. whee. the word "whee" is going to appear in every other sentence i type. so bear with me. a person who has gone madly high.

i originally thought it was going to be a boring march. but after walking flights and flights of stairs just to get to the parade square definitely woke me up and kept me going. sort of. argh. my brain is dead and im totally high. yepyep.. and i couldnt seat myself between W2 and W3 as what mok commanded me to do. but sitting between W3 and W4 gave me a good view of mok from my seat too! in fact i think it was a better view.

to see squads of officers belting out chinese english malay and tamil songs was an amusing sight. and the sight of SR nathan stopping right at the last officer to talk to him just for the photographers led the whole audience to chuckle with laughter too. it was as if everybody was holding their breathe and waiting to see which lucky officer kena picked on by him to be talked to. *grin* to be honest, i love every minute of the parade. loved the sight of kor, standing there in the drizzle and loved every minute of yakking with sijia throughout the whole parade. think without her, i might have just fallen asleep..

loved every minute taking photos with mok, and senior exco where yurui, sonia, jiatling.. and then looking for elvin, which thankfully i found him alone and not with his navy mates. or else imagine the amount of teasing he would get. argh. would the guys know the meaning of COUSINS?!? sheesh. haha.. and sijia said he was goodlooking.. ooh. *grin* then when she told yuan about elvin, yuan started jumping up and down going on and on about wanting to see him right in front of jordan. sheesh. and quite sadly her haojie wasnt with her. aw. wanted to take photo with him.. did take a photo with jordan ultimately.. maybe he's not that bad a senior after all. he's getting friendlier by the minute as i talk to him. sheesh.

whee. commissioning parade was just so fun. guessed i enjoyed myself, aside from jordan's wrong directions which led us into walking one whole big round before getting onto the bus at the holding area. wahaha... made such a huge embarrassment out of myself... but still, the night was fun.. whee. *tripleboing* *whee*

i know i sound extremely high. but this is one of the days i feel so darn proud of my kor. whee.

*yawn* i hate it when im down with fever. i never know when i kena fever and what the symptoms are like. went home at 12plus yesterday to see doctor, and doctor told me i had fever. temp was 38.7degrees and asked me if i wanted an injection to make my temp go down. noooooooooooo..... so the doc gave the usual blue tablets and one day mc.. so here am i, slacking my day away...
i think i've been sleeping too much..
mummy said i shouldnt have went out on sunday when it was raining the whole day.
but then again sunday was the funnest (is there such a word?) day i had for the new year. *glum* dont care, it's over anyway..

meimei ah, no la, im not pretty. *yawn* *concuss out on bed again*

surprisingly my comp net connection is extremely slow today. how ironic for a 512 broadband user. wonder if it has got anything to do with the weather today. cold nice and snuggly. perfect for a good nap at home, or a chill out session at my cousins' place. guess which one did i choose to do?

haha. of course the latter lah. -duh- when i say my cousin, i mean my maternal side. i dont usually have that much fun with cousins from my paternal side. trust me. if anyone of you has an extremely traditional extended family, you'll understand what im saying here. but i had immense fun at my cousins place. no matter was it yesterday and today. guess it sorta made up for last year when i dint get to see them much due to my uncle's death. *haii*

yesterday me and eileen (my cousin, not the classmate) had fun teaching my sis and another younger cousin cheryl how to play mahjong. asked elton if he wanted to learn he made a face at us. fine. *grin* then freddy came along and kept pinpointing eileen's tiles.. guess it's a brother's duty to sabo his own dear sister. aw. but we had fun i guess.. the girls picked it up quite fast and alfred was amazed at how the tiles could entertain us so much. offered us to play their playstation but we rejected him due to the intense attraction of mahjong. and not surprisingly i dint get to talk to elvin much. he pretty much hid in alfred's room the whole day yesterday and his own room upstairs for the whole of today. which wasnt surprising considering what had happened. those who know what happened, will know. as for those who dont know, it's not for you to know. get it? get it. but ultimately everybody are cousins. wat. maybe i shouldnt have given him the "eye" on da nian chu yi. oops. oh! and elton has bludgeoned in size. i.e. he grew fatter. im not kidding! i was pretty surprised myself and my dad had to remind him constantly .. wahaha.. and elvin has pretty much shrunk. a skinnier version of him. now im really surprised he's not attached, nor why no girls are literally chasing after him. such that he doesnt have a date for his commisioning ball. unbelievable. ooh, and justin is attached! to a girl studying at the same place as him, 2 years his junior and was from jjc.. heard that he went to see her dad today on da nian chu san.. when they are barely attached for about one month? from the sound of my aunt's grumbling, she thinks he can get a better one (which is prolly true since justin is the typical goodlooking guy) but afterall love is blind. haha... just realised that the cousins at my maternal side are all goodlooking.. as we all grow older, we get better and better.. im mean eileen is quite chio, my sis is not that bad looking, cheryl is woohoo the sexy one (or at least trying to be successfully when she's barely 14) and im not too bad either (okay im kidding myself and trying to make myself feel better).. as for the guys, if elton slims down he would look good, elvin justin and freddy are already goodlooking, just that freddy abit too beng looking.. haha.. and alfred is CUTE. as in the boyish cute. cmon he's barely 14 as well but he's a RI boy.. aiyah, he will turn out like elvin one day. i can imagine him evolving.. *grin* so we are all a bunch of good looking peeps. all from the same grand factory mah, what else to ask for? and have i mentioned before, all my cousins aged 24 and above are all damn chio/sexy and still single! all because they have too high standards for their boyfriends.. haha..

kk, i realise im babbling again, but this goes to show how much i love my maternal side.. *whee*

whee. had a fun reunion dinner today. at my paternal side of all things. i mean, i dont really like my paternal side that much due to several reasons but today we really had fun. tons of fun. maybe it's a good idea afterall to have all the cousins seated at the same table eating dinner together. weilun's idea of immitating seoul garden was a good one. i mean, youngsters like us would go more for this kinda dinner rather than the usual steamboat. and for once, we ate much much longer than the adults. even our uncles and aunts were looking at us enviously. not bad for an initial beginning when everybody had fun for reunion dinner. if the whole year could continue like this. then life at the paternal side would be so much more fun.

chinese new year seems to be like a fixed model for me right now. i can predict where i would be going for the next three days. it's either the paternal grandmother's place or the maternal side. but im sure looking forward to the nian chu 4 when we all troop down to sijia's place for fun. whee. i sure hope we'll get tons of fun when we crash her house on sunday.

haii. im still working on saturday. but i guess it doesnt really matter, since all house visits are scheduled to begin in the afternoon (in order to let us sleep in late mah. *hee*) not feeling extremely tired yet. i shall aim to sleep as late as possible tonight. or the next morning.

sometimes i feel as though im talking to myself online at my blog. full of nonsense and crap. *grin*

happy new year to all.

whee. just came home from dinner with kailyn! how fun it was. two silly idiots took 106 in hopes of getting down at holland v to have dinner at NYDC and we happily missed the busstop and landed at the next busstop which was somewhere in tanglin. so we made the ultimate decision and landed at wheelock place for NYDC. my goodness. it was packed. kailyn saw her rj peeps there. and i saw antonia and jasmine at wheelock as well.. they were looking for sakae sushi while we were looking for NYDC and our paths crossed each other. *laughs* and antonia said she wont have recognised me if i hadnt stopped her. did i really change that much? in terms of outlook in any sense. i sure hope it's for the better. *yawn* *feeling tired*

but i had a great day today. really great day.

guess there's only one person who understands me ultimately in everything. kailyn.

love ya gal. *muacks*

*bored*

do i really portray a very "english" outlook to other people?

just yesterday, i was asking yanlian if she could recommend any nice english oldies for me to download, since she was downloading them for her papa. and her reply was surprising. to me at least. she said, "i though you very 'english' one, so you should know the nice nice english oldies right?" and i was stunned for a second. no doubt i listen to perfect 10 and ufm1003 (which is a chinese station for those who dont know), it would only show that i balance both english and chinese songs, in which way do i suggest, from my personality and all, that i'm very 'english'?

i grew up in a chinese chinese family. listens to love 972 on the family radio, most of the time my tv is tuned permanently to channel 8, or channel U, with an occasional CNA (which is very rare unless im watching the news on my own). in fact i watch the 6.30 chinese news everyday. when i was young, i always dreamed of being a chinese news broadcaster, being able to inform and interest the audience of the current affairs. in chinese. to think when i was young, my favourite radio station was 958. im serious. really serious.

so i guess it was kind of a culture shock when i first stepped into rg. everybody there (at least in my class) was talking about hollywood and english pop music when i grew up watching hk serials, listening to chinese oldies and chinese music, with idols like xiao hu dui, email chou, daniel chan, cao meng etc. at least such things accompanied me to grow up, especially during the period of 8-10 when external factors were most influential. i guess. so it was quite a stark transition for me at least. i felt outright uncomfortable and felt like an outcast at times. and i refused to be influenced and changed in sec one. but as time passed, i realise i had to fit in with the surroundings, and environment. i really dint want to stand out right amongst the rest and i wanted to go with the flow. besides, my english standard was really lousy. so i changed. for the better i hope.

to my surprise, english music was nice. so were the english radio stations. and i guess i did myself a favour ultimately. no matter was it in terms of academic results and socialising with other people, everything just improved tremendously. in the past, my sis was the 'english' one and i was the 'cheena' one. now it seems as though it's the other way round. tried to persuade her to revert back to perfect 10, she gave me the exact same rebuttals i gave myself in the past. how ironic yeah?

but ultimately i guess a balance is required. and i like the balance. to be in touch and in sync with both chinese and english. im proud to say and claim that i 'excel' in both chinese and english. chinese because of my family background and english because of myself. i dont wanna lose touch with both i know. maybe because i like to think myself as a linguist. whether is it ultimately true, i dont know.

but i guess, i like myself now and this way. i love myself.

looks like working stress gets to alot of people and it can be quite scary. first mdm june fell sick, next was molly who took 2 weeks mc. overheard some of the teachers on the phone with molly and she said something about not ready to face the office nor staff yet. and now comes sophia who fell ill yesterday and i doubt if she can come in tmr cos she's having a fever. which brings the total number of people at the front office to a wonderful number of 2. me and yanlian. 2 newbies. how wonderful. im not trying to be sacarstic but it cannot be helped i guess. very often we either stare into stark empty space together, or running around like little bees flitting everywhere in the office trying to contact teachers or getting keys for them or busy fending off students.

now i understand why most people choose to be relief teachers after Alevels. it helps to keep them in touch with school life i guess. just that the roles are reversed this time round. we're the teachers/staff and the students live in "fear" or "respect" of us. which is apparently true. sometimes i walk around the school compounds during my lunch break and the vendors or students call me "teacher". sigh. i tried correcting the vendors but they still like to call me "lao shi". how amusing. and some kids can recognise me. like just currently when i was buying my lunch, this ava boy whom i had striked up a conversation with on saturday came running to me. the conversation was something as follows.

boy: weina! weina!
me: yesh what?
boy: my class got no teacher now. how?
me: who's sposed to be in there?
boy: mrs peng..
me: mrs jennifer peng is on mc today. there's should be a relief teacher in your class.
boy: i dont know! office asked me to come and look for you
me: *puzzled* office? sophia is in the office you know, and im sposed to be having my lunch break now!!
boy: ooh, sophia is in the office? dint check just now.. okay, now i go office and ask. byebye!

cheeky little fella. tried to cheat me by saying that office asked him to come and ask me. haha. i can recognise some familar faces too, and they would smile at me too. the feeling is nice and warming i guess. nothing beats more than being able to interact with students, teachers and feel as though im in a big family as well. the HODs here are real nice. especially some of them, like mrs wong, mdm salbiah, mrs loo, ms florence lee, ms margaret teo, mr thiru, mr subash. think i've named everybody except for mr loh. me and yanlian agreed that mr loh is scary. whee. and have i mentioned that the female teachers at hillgrove are all damn chio? super pretty and good figures too. and they are real friendly too. i quite like my job here i guess. it beats staying at home rotting my time away.

ooh, and im going to camp christine! for volunteer camp. i know i've mentioned it before but this time round it's confirmed! i'll be the only one representing beyond social services so i guess i would be feeling quite nervous. i sure wonder how would the camp be like, how many people are attending etc. dont really know the details yet but i should be expecting a phone call from them anytime soon before the camp itself. i like making myself busy, with meaningful stuff. whee. i dont mind getting tired because of volunteering because i know it is all worthwhile.

i love volunteering. whee. *hop*

the office seems so quiet today. hm.
feels awfully weird.

got a surprise call from yik this afternoon. while i was working. *grin* but it was nice to hear her voice again i guess.. and im so lucky! *whee* she asked me if i wanted to go for the NCSS volunteer circle: volunteers networking camp at camp christine! ahh.. obviously i would want to go *wide smile* i mean, if this happened last year, i prolly couldnt have spared the time to go down. now that i have the chance, why not? it's a camp to share about volunteering experience and networking as a whole. obviously i would jump at the chance to go. just one problem. im working on saturday morning, so either i exchange shift with sophia or i rush all the way down to NCSS which is all the way at ghim moh. *hm* guess i'll decide then. whee.

for the first time in the week, i dont feel tired in the morning. on monday and tuesday, i went to work with bleary eyes and a constantly opening mouth. but today was totally different! maybe it was the after effects of jap class. haha. but sophia went home early today cos she wasnt feeling well. and then she had to call to say that she is going on mc tmr. which means there's only me and yanlian left in the front office tmr. yanlian is going in at 7.30. her usual time. should i join her early? i scared she cannot manage the teachers and students after assembly. maybe i join her at 8. dont wanna be strolling into the school at 7.30 when assembly is still going on and all staff and students are gathered at the parade ground. hee. realised the work mdm june gave me is not actually alot. it looks as though there is alot of work to be done, with her and molly both on long term mc, and now sophia will be gone for one day as well, but actually it's quite manageable. so as long as i dont worry myself out and think too much. the computer server for EWSS is damn slow. easy process to update all the teachers' profile, but when im faced with a freaking slow computer, it takes me ages to finish up the whole thing. *yawn* but im sure happy that yanlian and kailyn are working at the same place as i am. *whee* although kailyn is up at the staff room and i'm down at the office. i quite like working at the office, cos im still in contant interaction with teachers and students.

i still miss school. interacting with all my classmates and friends.. nothing beats having friends by your side 5 days a week. if only i can be a student again..

whee. today was such a long day for me. first work, then jap class. realised jap class is such a wonderful solution to all my worried and stress. what a relief. though i dont really know the people there yet, except for a few friends and goons that i've gotten to know over the past 4 lessons. some true friends, some entertaining idiots. to think i went to the first lesson with a nervous attitude. people like dawn and mingli (poor girl, had a bad fall and is now recuperating at home) and the four lousy guys who make stupid jokes out of the desk (tsekue) desu ka issue. and the tofu one. seriously ah. but im glad they're all around the same age as me, they're all 19! and i'm the only one who's 18 but thankfully im not the youngest. francis thinks all junior college students are nuts but dawn proved to him that poly students can be crazy as well. haha.. guess im just a li' high after jap class. after the boisterous laughing we had while doing mix and match group work (with kenny rearranging everything and making kelvin, dawn and me redoing everything) all my worries seem to be gone. as in really gone. maybe it might resurface sometime later but i guess this feelings and emotions can last me for one or two days. the guys are a nice bunch of people actually, but was just wondering why they get to come out from NS at night to go study jap and still have lotsa hair. *grin* to think i initially thought they were j1s cos i overheard them talking about fmaths. *shudder* i love my jap class! woohoo.. whee.

hm. dint realise i never told roo about us having s7 seniors before. i thought i did. maybe i did but she forgot. or maybe i just didnt. haii. it really brings back all memories yeah? *sigh*

long long time ago. i.e. in the year 2001, there was only 5 s3 classes, it only went all the way until 01s35. then comes year 2002. the year when i stepped into jc. i opted to do double maths double science in hopes of being in the same class as junhui and joyce zhuang. we figured the chances of us getting into the same class was much higher than the chances of wanyu yuting yy and joyce tan getting into the same class. fate played us out and how naive we were. junhui landed in 02s34, joyce in 02s35 and me in 02s36. wanyu and yuting landed in 02s75, while yuyuan and joyce tan were in 02s76. how ironic. maybe if i didnt opt to do CLao, i might have been in the same class as junhui or joyce zhuang if i dint opt to do CLao, but i guess i dont really regret my choice. in a way i guess.

since 02s36 was an extra class, we did not have a senior class immediately because there wasnt a 01s36. on the night when we knew our class, and nobody knew each other, we had 2 classes introducing themselves as our seniors because they did not have any junior classes. they were 01s7B and 01s7C respectively. i vaguely remember vanessa introducing herself and jordan making himself buddy buddy with lenith because da jie was already training water polo with the hwa chong team and jordan happened to be the water polo vice captain. surprisingly i cannot remember anything about 01s7B. dont really know how they settled amongst themselves, but 01s7c became our senior class in the end. wonderful choice they made. *grin*

initially, we felt very weird. maybe it was just me but the whole idea of being the extra class in s3 stood out alot. everybody forgot about us. during audition for campfire night in LT1, chee how happily announced the sequence for performance and left us out. somebody commented, hey let's zao and nobody will remember all about us. apparently one female councillor overheard and reminded cheehow. he added us in with a sheepish look. i guess it wasnt his fault lah but as fac head, he should have made an extra effort to remember. if even he cant remember us, who will? then when we performed our item (which was streetdance cheorographed by venus and jinyang) everybody stared. as in, literally stared. like we came from outer space. like what's wrong with having street dance as an item? just because it aint cheena they dont hafta stare right. it took a while before the applause came in. guess they were quite stunned at that point of time. stunned to the effect that they forgot to clep.

fine, we're 02s36, an extra class in s3 whose main conversation language is english because nearly a quarter of the class (i.e. the acsi people) cant converse in chinese for goodness sake and we prefer to speak in english. which was not the norm in s3. even the singaporeans speak fluent chinese. but what the hell. we enjoyed ourselves as a class. had tons of fun together being the odd one in s3. when the whole fac (or rather, the then 02s33) and 02s34 were totally immersed in dramafeste, we stayed out of it. entirely, when dramafeste was an english production and our class conversed in english entirely. only dewen went for it. i can swear, we were living in a world of our own, apart from the s3 faculty. our nice nice 01s7c seniors were in our world as well and we lived happily. playing angel mortal and getting presents for everybody during cny and valentines day. and having our twice a week orchard visits, going to our lao di fang to eat dinner and being unglam by sitting down at taka square as one whole big group. those were the days i guess.

yuan and her dingdang, and whatever rubbish about getting a boyfriend each from the five different faculties. eileen and her hua hui hua zhuang when she tries to convince one of the guys in class to go be her model. yijian and his lame corny jokes. lenith and his "dajie" thing. jinyang being yijian's sidekick. remember he once used his file to hit yijian for something i cannot quite remember. but it was during maths lec. darryl guay being *condemned* ruoling and venus being "the ones with ties who make alot of noise in lecture". xinxin being her crappy and lame one as usual. lilian and elsa being the meinu and baobiao. becca and her jiaozi jokes. chiobu for being our boss. dewen for being the maths genius who had a different frequency from us. yanlian being the "dont care" about sitting posture one. vivian for her constant messaging. zhangqing for being the only PRC in the class but is hip enough to join in on our daily outings. wilbur for being the constant "rock", stoning most of the time. the seniors for being the seniors always there for us. like how jordan and fang nien slipped into our maths lecture once to bring us fried jiao zi. and the sweet chio girls who entertain us with their funny conversations.

and the maths lectures are our most entertaining lectures. when yijian and jinyang used to fool around with the laser pointer and drive tan kian hwa confused by seeing 2 red dots on the screen. and where did our class diary go? im sure the tan kian hwa = orange meet flower joke is somewhere in the book.. the "key please" joke and mdm yeo looking like a gnome. or what's the creature? and the new year goodies being passed around during lecture. we had plenty of picnics during maths lectures. thank goodness we were sitting at the top right corner of the lt. not forgetting the 36 slang that came after watching i not stupid together. the "tpang" is the most commonly used phrase and i remember yijian using the "lin bei" one very often the few days following the movie. and our last minute baking done at chiobu's house and he not knowing where everything was in the kitchen. pampered kid wat.

so we enjoyed ourselves for 3 whole months. then the dreaded day came. i.e. results of Olevels. turned out half the class couldnt stay. only barely 10-12 of us could stay on. impossible to remain as a class. too small. venus and ruoling managed to appeal back successfully. chiobu yijian went ac, yuan went nj and vivian went tj. lilian dint wanna stay cos she wanted to go spore poly do opt all along and becca chose to return to jjc cos life was too stressful for her. condemned chose to switch out of the class. lenith appealed back in and chose to do s6. and there was talks of csy switching to vj. so on the first day of school, there were only me xinxin jinyang eileen dewen zhangqing yanlian elsa i think. did i miss out anybody? what a short queue. and there were long talks about teachers dint like 02S33 to be a pure PRC class (well almost) and there were talks of dissolving 02s36.

i guess ultimately they sort of did. 02s36 wasnt separated but the whole spirit of the class was destroyed by the whole event itself. people were long gone, and everybody was upset over the whole issue. the guys might have seemed to have not cared, but it was obvious that they dint want to leave. the girls were crying day in day out. i cried too, for that was my favourite class ever since my secondary school life. never in my life had i gotten a class so united and bonded as a whole. never. and to take it away from everybody in the class was a sin indeed.

the seniors were quite upset when they got to know the news and they tried to appeal to the school admin on our behalf not to split the class. the school admin relented in the end. but it was a cruel thing to do to 02s33 as well. i mean, they would love it as a PRC class for everybody was along the same frequency together. well, in the end both sides were hurt and nobody turned out happy.

lived with that for 2 whole years and i've being wanting to pen down the whole issue. guess i sorta did it today. the memories will always remain, and i still consider myself part of 02s36 and junior of 01S7C. always. 02s33 wasnt my choice. wonder what the rest of 02s36 thinks about it. if they still miss the good old days like me..

just read huiru's blog. she has a nice layout, which looks suspiciously familar. think i've seen it before on blogskins right? *grin* anyway, she sounds as though she thoroughly enjoyed herself during orientation and i guess i got to know the grandjuniors a tiny weeny bit more from her blog. i really must make an effort to remember her blog website. and i wonder how many people knows her webby. hm. better not link her unless she gives the permission to me to link her up.

today's a lazy sunday afternoon.

havent been doing much today, except getting the much needed rest that lacked since friday. *yawn* realised as compared to before Alevels, i get tired more easily now. though i still sleep about the same number of hours a day, which mounts up to an estimated 6-7 hours a day, i realise i still slack my day away when im not working. but if i do too much things in a day, i tire out easily. *yawn* and people are rarely online nowadays for me to talk to. either that or im online most of the time such that people are coming online comparatively lesser now.

realise we havent been that great a senior class after all. i cant claim i know all my juniors in my junior class and i cant say we have an astounding rapport with them as well. all we did was to make them enjoy orientation and have stj, jts together. aside from that, we had different class benches due to us being too used to the 7c class bench and not getting to know each other much more. used to think last year that angel mortal game was not as fun, as how it was with the 7c seniors when we were j1s. i can still remember the time when we found packets and packets of hershley kisses given to our class girls in the angel mortal box on valentine's day and we thought they were given to us by the senior class guys. turned out yijian was the one who bought it for all the class girls when lilian told me the secret some time after the class split. and the days when everybody started adopting mortals and we kept gossipping about how and why the senior class guys chose to adopt certain people in the junior class just because they were chio. *grin* and i really enjoyed writing letters during that period of time, whether it was to baoli (mi angel) and weiliang (mi mortal).. they were utmost honest and we had tons of fun corresponding. and the 7c seniors did tell us before that, 02s36 got 01s7c closer than before, all because of our unique unitedness during 1st three months. it's special and heartwarming to see how our unitedness has influenced others to become more bonded and closer.

quite sad that that dint repeat itself when our juniors came in. i really doubt if anyone of us did make much of an impact on anyone of them. like the impact haojie made on yuan, shihui made on xinxin, fang nien made on eileen, yanlian etc. we dint do that to our juniors. we just werent close to them. maybe one partial reason was not sharing the same class bench as them and not talking to them as much. but sometimes people gotta take the initiative. and i guess the senior class 02s33 just dint have the initiative. just like how 01s33 lost the initiative to come know their new juniors when the class split and merged again. we see each other as strangers usually. the only people i really talk to are only tim and mok. and even when mok is my "kor" it is through interact and not based on senior class. maybe because 1st three months was over by then and they had to study for their Alevels. but whatever happened to our class? i can claim for one, that we did not make the effort to be close with them. maybe they did not as well. the whole atmosphere was just different to begin with.

hm. that's actually quite a tough topic to be thinking about.

it brings back all the jc memories and make me wonder, what would life be like is 02s36 still existed. if everybody were still around, would life be as interesting and as exciting as before, just like the 1st three months?

my arms are aching. and i swear i havent been to the gym to train my arms. but you cant blame the cute kid who demanded to be carried around after i started carrying him. *grin* they're simply such a lovable lot. in case anybody is wondering, im back to bukit ho swee as a volunteer again, and i really love going there. im sooo glad the kids still remember my name and now im a "grandma" to a certain naughty vinod who calls me "grandma" half the time.. dint get to see logan there yesterday but heard from his mum he would be appearing on channel 5 on the 28th jan.. which coincidentally is the date of the commisioning march for mok. and i still dont know where what time the whole event is. thank goodness sijia is going with me. *phew*

many things have happened over the past two days and i've been thinking alot. i.e. alot. but it's in the good way, so dont worry. i should bring a notebook with me everywhere i go cos i realise i think alot on the buses. especially whenever i listen to gregorian music. allows me to clear my mind and think about everything anything.

but first, orientation yesterday. it wasnt a success, but my trip down there was worth it. got to talk to the teachers, seniors and juniors alike and realised that i should catch up with everybody i can now while im still free and happy. wanted to talk to wendy and pansy but they werent around. sheesh. but i finally talked to huiru, the mei whom i havent talked to face to face since rgs prom night (which was about one month ago) for a long time yesterday night. did realise that i miss her alot. and im glad she seems relatively happy in her class. just found it weird to see why the junior and senior class dint interact much at KAP yesterday. after all the efforts to cheong there and grab seats, all they did was to separate into two classes and start playing bridge. *grin* looks like bridge/cards will forever remain a 33 tradition until next year, when the last s33 class appears. since they're going to scrape the double maths syllabus after that. so double maths people are a rare species indeed. so am i! *whee*

to my surprise, saw kaihui yesterday at hwachong too, and she's in 04S74 (urgh. somebody read this? *grin*) poor kaihui. *grin* looks like roo and her came here together. i wonder how many rg girls are there in hwachong this year. would prbably recognise the hadlians in hc because they're my psl batch juniors. whee. and roo has to go back to teach mass dance today. how sad. oops. but it's quite stupid to make the seniors go back down and teach last year's mass dance when it is easier for kavana to come up with one new mass dance for the sec ones.

got to talk to jason teo for quite a while too. ultimately i think he's quite a nice guy, contrary to what others think. people might think he's buaya and all, but underneath all that, he's just a plain nice guy. guess you gotta talk to him alot more to find that out for yourself. well. he's a great senior i guess, aside for his new hairstyle which seriously reminds me of mr lau, the maths tutor. and he said he straightened his hair. all of things, a guy straightening his hair. i have a feeling mr lau did something similar to his hair too. and ms ng is engaged! she said she would show us photos when we go back to see her next time. i should go back and visit hwa chong more often. but when i have the time yeah? im making an empty promise to myself cos i know i wont have the time unless i go down early in the morning, and go to work after that. *grin*

which brings me to a point. i realise we can never judge a person by what others think about them. some people may feel that somebody else is "blah blah blah" but in actual fact the particular somebody may not be as bad as all the rest make out to be. it's for us to get to know the person and see the person for ourselves. we aint doing other people a favour by condemning them before we really get to know them and we are not doing ourselves any favours as well. for all we know, they may turn out to be our best friends for all we know. everything has got to be experienced by oneself before we can make any conclusions and that includes dealing with people and relationships. plenty of examples for such situations but i shant mention it here.

yeah. cant remember what else i was thinking about on the bus. which brings me to remember i should get a notebook so that i can scribble my thoughts away.

cant believe im blogging early in the morning at 8.08am right before going off for work. days have been passing by very slowly. im actually living life on a day by day basis. keeping myself spurred on by giving myself things to look forward to. like yesterday, there was the mona lisa smile movie yesterday with xinxin ruoling venus jingwen. tho it was just a mere short time being spent together and quite a rush from work as well, it was all worth the effort i guess. nothing beats getting to meet up with friends and crap together. *grin* and the movie was GREAT. as in, really good. it wasnt as literary as what i thought, but a simple plot was all it required to portray the goodness of the teacher, and the obstinate thinking of the students (fine im biased.). but julia roberts just doesnt have a 50s image. sheesh.

04s33 is out and huiru is in it! *grin* so happy. just a gut feeling, but i just knew that she would end up in my junior class and being my grand junior. and now i get to tell the juniors that i know their junior class better than them. darn, now there's one more reason for me to go down to STJ or JTS. hope huiru and wendy dont make me go down all together. haha. sheesh. really gotta go to work liaoz. whee. im sure looking forward to getting my pay. almost $1000 a month. not bad lah, though the working hours are comparatively longer than the relief teachers. yawn. i feel physically tired, but not mentally. time to go. although i end up reaching workplace 15 min earlier. looking forward to campfire tmr!

i love books and i love to be in a world of books and books alone. books can transmit me into a world of fantasy, thriller and excitement. somewhere where i dont really go to in reality. just bought andy mcnab's liberation day (his very newest) for only $7.90, such a bargain. bought it at clementi BIG bookshop.. almost wanted to buy lost light but the two books remaining werent in very good condition. hm. to think i get so picky over buying books. some people told me i dont portray the look of a "book freak" but i think i am. what's wrong with being a book freak? nothing wrong right? my friends know that im a book freak so well such that they would recommend good books to me, and likewise i encourage them to read as well. no matter if it's just the papers, or novels, it's good to catch up on reading. i realised today i like reading on buses, while listening to music. i'm sort of in a world of my own, with nobody to disturb me and i can move through alot of pages just being on a half an hour bus journey. maybe that's why i like to travel alone sometimes. to catch up on reading. another good reading place i like to be in would be my bedroom. as i chill out to jazz or new age, i start reading on my bed.. and that goes on for the next 2 hours straight. jazz and new age music are very nice to chill out to, especially gregorian chants and jazz but nat king cole.. what a raspy yet jazzy voice. buble is another good jazz singer as well. havent gotten his new second album. shall do so when i get my salary.. hm. havent listened much to pop music nowadays, especially the radio. maybe im getting myself too immersed in jazz and new age, but new age soothes me out. relieve me of my stress and brings me away from whatever worries i have.

very weird but whenever i try to access blogspots, they redirect me to the blogger main page. something is definitely wrong with blogger, but i shall not be too bothered.

whee. had a very enjoyable day yesterday.. first it was meeting up with the exco people at yy's house in the morning and early afternoon.. though it was just a simple day of bowling and playing cards at her place, it was very nice catching up with each other finally.. the WORLDs debate was damn good yesterday.. went for the finals with jinyang ruoling sijia eileen and i had a wonderful time listening to the various points put forth by the 4 finalist teams. i hate to say this but the SIM team performed the worst out of the 4 teams.. i like the team from university of sydney union, which was also the concluding team of the opposition. their points were quite valid, unlike the team from middle temple (though they won due to their clarity and way of delivery i think), and their flair for the english language is quite evident. if only i can be as fluent as they are in the english language.. after listening to the debate yesterday, i realise im a long way from being a linguist in the english language.. yeah.and the motion for the debates finals was quite interesting. it was "this house bans abortions of foetuses on the grounds of permanent disability". it was interesting to hear new points being made by the four different teams during the debate, and some of them was as ridiculous as how they chose to put it, while others sounded perfectly logical and made utmost sense to me. there. im not being biased here yeah? hm. oh and dinner after the debate was almost simply perfect. why do i say "almost"? that's because everybdoy was there except for venus.. which was a pity i guess cos it was almost like a class dinner (without the PRCs in any case unless they fly back to singapore?!?) and in a good way, it dint feel like a class gathering in any way, to me it felt more like a gathering of friends for dinner with 10 people forming a huge group standing outside NYDC.. dinner was expensive lah ( like -duh- *grin*) but i thought it was all worth it.. who knows when we can get together like this again? sigh. i love my class. my jc class i mean. made up of wonderful nice people with no airs and everybody gets along pretty well. not that there aint cliques (which is natural) but we can still mix well amongst each other, which is the perfect compromise. whee.

i love my class. and the people in it.

shopping for work clothes is such a chore. sickeningly tiring. sheesh. and to think i thought i could survive shopping with my mother in a crowded jurong point. never ever go jurong point on a public holiday. nor the eve of the public holiday as well. it was a mad house yesterday and today as well. especially NTUC yesterday. and BEGA today. haiyoh. if i knew there were gonna be sucha huge crowd, i'd rather wear a skirt to work tmr. *yawn* starting work orientation tmr. i sure hope the people there are easy to work with.. the operations manager, uncle song, there is very cute.. when i was there for the interview yesterday, he presumed i was the chosen one and started teaching me where all the keys were kept just in case i need to get them for teachers and introduced himself to me.. a very fatherly figure i guess. *grin* and the malay clerk was very nice as well. and molly is a very nice person too.. whee. there i go, going on and on and on. i dont think i would be working all the way until 6 since it is only an orientation.. i sure hope i get to go home and slack abit more..

finally meeting up with exco on saturday at yy's place.. im sure looking forward to it sia, and after that will most prob be going down for debate finals at victoria concert hall.. i sure hope the debate motion is going to be an exciting one, or else i might just fall asleep in the hall itself..

realised blogging works my brain. sort of i guess, when i think about what i wanna blog about for the day and i sure gave my brain a hell lot of excercise yesterday. im pretty sure ms heng will faint at my grammatical errors and an abundance usage of net language but i guess anything goes online. can still remember dewen's essay that he blogged online at the class blog, which was downright outrageous and funny.. if only we had printed a copy for ms heng to see.. *smile*

and i guess im right in saying that i want people to know more about myself, through blogging. yuan actually mentioned in her blog before, if people blog to vent frustrations or blog to let other people read. i guess im a mixture, doing both at the same time..